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THEORETICAL CONSIDERATIONS OF VIOLENT MARRIAGES

NCJ Number
47964
Journal
Social Casework Volume: 58 Issue: 9 Dated: (NOVEMBER 1977) Pages: 515-526
Author(s)
M ELBOW
Date Published
1977
Length
12 pages
Annotation
PERSONALITY CHARACTERISTICS ARE DESCRIBED FOR FOUR TYPES OF WIFE ABUSERS, AND SUGGESTIONS ARE GIVEN FOR HANDLING EACH TYPE. SOCIAL WORKERS ARE WARNED THAT WHEN THE WIFE ATTEMPTS TO LEAVE, THE HUSBAND MAY BECOME HOMICIDAL.
Abstract
ALL TOO OFTEN, THE SIMPLE SOLUTION OF SUGGESTING THAT A WOMAM LEAVE HER ABUSING HUSBAND IS NOT AS SIMPLE AS IT SEEMS. THIS ARTICLE EXAMINES THE FORCES WHICH KEEP A WOMAN IN AN ABUSING RELATIONSHIP IN ORDER TO DISCUSS STRATEGIES FOR INTERVENTION FOR EACH OF FOUR TYPES OF WIFE-ABUSE SYNDROMES AND TO UNDERSCORE THE GRAVITY OF MARITAL VIOLENCE. THE COMMON CHARACTERISTICS OF ABUSERS ARE EXAMINED: AN INCLINATION TO PROJECT BLAME FOR MARITAL STRIFE, A STRONG NEED FOR THE WOMAN TO CONFORM TO HIS DEFINITION OF HER ROLE WITHIN THE SYSTEM, A TENDENCY TO PROJECT HIS MOTHER'S ATTITUDES UPON THE WIFE, A RIGID EXPECTATION OF THE MARRIAGE, A LACK OF INTIMACY. HOWEVER, THERE ARE ALSO ATTRACTIVE CHARACTERISTICS; PROFESSIONALS OFTEN DENY THE POSITIVE CHARACTERISTICS FOUND IN THE MARRIAGE AND ATTRIBUTE THE WIFE'S RELUCTANCE TO LEAVE TO MASOCHISTIC NEEDS. FOUR TYPES OF WIFE ABUSERS ARE DISCUSSED: (1) THE 'CONTROLLER,' WHO SEES THE WIFE AS AN OBJECT TO BE CONTROLLED; (2) THE 'DEFENDER,' WHO EXPECTS HIS WIFE TO LOVE AND FORGIVE HIM NO MATTER HOW MUCH HE ABUSES HER; (3) THE 'APPROVAL SEEKER,' WHO IS SO INSECURE THAT HE CANNOT TOLERATE THE REJECTION IMPLICIT IN HIS WIFE'S LEAVING AND OFTEN THREATENS HER WITH DEATH; AND (4) THE 'INCORPORATOR,' WHO SEES HIS WIFE AS AN EXTENSION OF HIMSELF AND OFTEN THREATENS VIOLENCE BECAUSE HER LEAVING IS SUCH A THREAT TO HIS EGO. COUNSELORS ARE URGED TO HELP THE WIFE REALIZE THAT SHE IS NOT 'CAUSING THE ABUSE.' PERSONS INTERVENING ARE ALSO URGED TO BE PATIENT AND NOT FORCE A CHANGE IN THE EQUILIBRIUM OF THE RELATIONSHIP UNTIL THE WIFE IS ABLE TO COPE WITH THE CONSEQUENCES. PROFESSIONALS ALSO SHOULD BE AWARE OF THE POTENTIAL FOR HOMICIDE. EFFORTS TO PREVENT THIS TRAGEDY MUST BE PROVIDED FOR IN AGENCY POLICIES. FOOTNOTES CONTAIN REFERENCES, AND THE FOUR PERSONALITY TYPES ARE SUMMARIZED IN A TABLE. (GLR)

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