Mediation Models - An Integrated Approach (From Alternative Means of Family Dispute Resolution, P 219-228, 1982, Howard Davidson et al, ed. - See NCJ-92365)

• NCJ Number: 92168
• Author(s): A D Massengill
• Date Published: 1982
• Length: 10 pages
• Sale Source: American Bar Assoc
• Language: English
• Country: United States of America

Annotation

Successful mediation of divorce cases requires that the mediator assist emotionally distraught spouses toward the acceptance phase of the separation and divorce process.

Abstract

Only if both spouses can become future-focused in their thinking, can they begin to cooperate toward working out an equitable agreement concerning their property and their children. The emotional spectrum ranges from initial shock, to denial, to anger, to ambivalence, and finally to acceptance of the inevitable separation and divorce. The mediator is faced with difficulty in that emotional parity at the acceptance level is the state at which agreements are possible, but in most cases, one spouse is much further along the emotional progression than the other. To help the divorcing partners achieve acceptance, it is suggested that the mediator use emotional diagrams through which clients can make their feelings more objective. Such diagrams are especially useful in explaining the spectrum of emotions that will be experienced; the 'emotional sewer' from which both partners must emerge, pulling their children with them; and the difference between a terminated marital relationship and that of parents, which necessarily continues throughout life. Another diagram illustrates concentrated focus on individual goals and concrete, pragmatic planning to achieve them. Illustrations and five references are given.