NCJ Number
57122
Date Published
1978
Length
60 pages
Annotation
THIS 1978 HANDBOOK, WRITTEN BY THE PEACE OFFICERS' WIVES' CLUBS AFFILIATED OF CALIFORNIA (POWCA), TELLS HOW THESE WOMEN HAVE DEALT WITH THE PROBLEMS OF BEING MARRIED TO POLICEMEN.
Abstract
THE CLUB WANTED TO SPEAK DIRECTLY TO THE WIVES OF POLICEMEN WITHOUT HAVING THEIR ADVICE FILTERED BY PROFESSIONAL COUNSELORS AND ACADEMICIANS OR DISTORTED BY EMBITTERED EXWIVES. WHILE PREPARED BY THREE POWCA MEMBERS, THE BOOK REFLECTS THE INSIGHTS OF HUNDREDS OF MEMBERS WHO SHARED THEIR EXPERIENCES. THEY STRESS THE PRIDE OF BEING MARRIED TO POLICEMEN AND DEAL CANDIDLY WITH ADJUSTMENTS WHICH HAVE TO BE MADE. CREATIVE RESPONSE TO PROBLEMS IS STRESSED INSTEAD OF MEEK ACCEPTANCE OR COMPLAINING. FOR EXAMPLE, ROTATING WORK SHIFTS CAN LEAD TO REWARDING NEW USES OF TIME SPENT TOGETHER. FATHERS CAN BECOME MORE INVOLVED WITH THEIR FAMILIES, ALLOWING WIVES FREE TIME AWAY FROM CONSTANT FAMILY DEMANDS. TO RESPOND CREATIVELY TO PROBLEMS REQUIRES THAT THE WIFE UNDERSTAND THE CHANGES WHICH WILL OCCUR AS HER HUSBAND PROGRESSES IN HIS CAREER. DETAILED DESCRIPTIONS ARE PROVIDED OF THE FIVE EMOTIONAL STAGES IN A POLICEMAN'S LIFE. SINCE THE ROOKIE YEAR IS SUCH AN IMPORTANT PERIOD IN DETERMINING THE SUCCESS OF A MARRIAGE, WIVES SHOULD WORK AT ESTABLISHING EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATIONS WITH THEIR HUSBAND. MANY POLICEMEN TRY TO COPY THE FICTIONAL T.V. COP BOTH ON THE JOB AND IN THE HOME. THE CYNICAL STAGE IS MARKED BY ANGER AT PEOPLE AND THE SYSTEM. WIVES SHOULD ENCOURAGE THEIR HUSBANDS TO EXPRESS FEELINGS, BUT SHOULD HELP THEM TO SEE THAT THERE ARE GOOD PEOPLE IN THE WORLD. IN THE FOURTH STAGE, MEN COME TO A REALISTIC UNDERSTANDING OF THEIR JOBS. SINCE POLICE RETIRE AT A RELATIVELY YOUNG AGE THIS FINAL STAGE SHOULD BE PREPARED FOR IN ADVANCE. SPECIAL ATTENTION IS ADDRESSED TO THE THREE BIG PROBLEMS OF BEING MARRIED TO POLICEMEN; ALCOHOLISM, DIVORCE, AND ACCIDENTS. A CHAPTER IS DEVOTED TO DEALING WITH FRIENDS, NEIGHBORS, AND FAMILY. SOURCES OF OUTSIDE HELP ARE ALSO LISTED. NO REFERENCES ARE INCLUDED. (KCP)